Laughs and Lobotomies

I’m fine I’m fine I’m fine is the mantra I told myself for years.

I shared it with others.

Maybe if I said it enough times I would be.

But when my sight was clear, the duct tape and chewing gum holding me together seemed so flimsy.

I couldn’t macgyver myself well anymore.

There weren’t enough paper clips

Or superglue

Or even thumbtacks

To put it back the way it should be.

So as the gum and tape are worn by rain and storm I still stand.

And I ask for a reason why.

Sometimes I scream it loud so it echoes or whisper it quiet as a mouse.

But still no answer.

Why hell is here on earth.