Laughs and Lobotomies

I had a mug as a teenager.

On it was written “The Pessimist’s Mug: The glass is now half empty”, and it had a line at the halfway mark.

So through trauma, or maybe something innate, I’ve been a pessimist most of my life.

I have lost so much – family, friends, health, finances, career.

But I’m still standing.  And I’m standing next to the man I love.

He is still here.  And of all the dreams I’ve had in my life – I always saw myself alone.

I was born a Catholic – and I chose Saint Catherine of Siena when I was confirmed at age 11 or so.

I read about her when choosing the name – but I was young, and I can’t say I remember too much of why I chose her.

There is a quote attributed to Saint Catherine – “Be who God meant you to be and you will set the whole world on fire”.

And also one to Oscar Wilde – “Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future”

The only path left to take – is forward.