Laughs and Lobotomies

Do I think I have the correct diagnoses? 

I don’t think it matters – I think symptoms are treated, and most overlap so for clinical purposes – it doesn’t matter.

Or as I’ve put it less eloquently in the past, “well you give the same damn drugs for everything”.

I think the treatment was worse than the cure.

I think I was gaslit by medical professionals into thinking that there was something deeply, fundamentally wrong with me, in order to oversell expensive fancy new atypical antipsychotics and cyclical therapy that never taught you how to get better – just how to feel better about being a fuck up.

I think I was left with additional trauma, mental and physical, that will always be there.

And I don’t think humans should be put into 10-question diagnostic buckets used to discredit and abuse them for their entire lives.

So the answer is I can’t take it all back.

I’m not looking for *those* answers – I just want to move forward – with the love of my life. And close the door on the rest.